Getting through things

Megan is a single mother with two children at primary school. She was injured in an assault just over a year ago. She stays home a lot to make sure she is around for her kids as much as possible. Because her injury was caused by an assault, working with police and keeping her family safe have taken priority during her recovery. Her symptoms have made it a lot harder for her to make sense of what has happened.

I still can’t work out why did it happen, and there are still days when you get down and question why did it happen. But in the end, you’ve still gotta continue on with life. I’m still breathing. I’m still walking. I can still function as a normal human being and I’m lucky that I can do that cause there’s a lot of people that don’t. Even though it’s hard there’s no point being angry cause it just eats you up. So, yeah, I try and laugh at it now—say to the kids yes mum is fine. She does remember things now. You’ve gotta focus on the positive for other people—the kids… my dad, he’s quite negative about what happened, so I don’t focus on the negative side of things with him. I’m the only close one in his family so it’s hard for him.

My dad says I’m not motivated, I don’t do what I could do, but it’s hard. I can’t drive any more cos of the blackouts, so I rely on buses, and my neighbour, if she’s around, will take me places. I don’t have to pay for a warrant of fitness and registrations and things like that and it can be cheaper but it’s harder to do things now. Its wrong to think like this but I still worry about it being dangerous to do normal things. There’s that little voice inside your head that still tells you ‘be careful’. I didn’t even wanna go to the shops' cos it was just like, dunno, you’re brain’s just telling you ‘don’t’, it’s like putting up a barrier. I haven’t told anybody about that fear, but I think it might just be in the back of my mind forever. Maybe easier to get away proper—I’d like to go somewhere… take the family and go to Australia or something, get away from the routine. Police can lay charges on this or you can go through restorative justice but I’ve been trying for all this time to just find some space to just sort of get it sorted in my head—the injury and how it happened. I’m in the process of coming out more now… but it’s still… I think twice about everything.

You sort of knew where your life was going before the injury, you had control of it, then after the injury you’ve, you know,  had to veer off on a side road where you don’t know where it goes, where it ends or what’s gonna happen down that road. But good things could… have... happened down that road. I’m a different person now—in some way, I’m more relaxed than I was because I know I can’t control everything. I’ve got a chance to start on a different life. My kids are great—they see the good side of things—just naturally. With them life is hopeful. I’ve got a sore head or I can’t remember or I get blackouts but I’m here and I’ve got another chance at life. My kids help me see what’s good and what’s possible. ACC means I’m not on the street, I’m getting help and I’m making progress.

This case is a composite example created for illustrative purposes. It is drawn from the stories of several different people. Names and details have been changed to protect confidentiality.